Why is it so hard to move on from someone who treated me like their partner for almost a year only to find out they were aromantic. Its tearing me apart cuz we were never a thing n i get so jealous when i seen her n her hg flirting. im so jealous n scared. it wasnt js simple, it ran deep into the majority of interactions we had together. She referred to me as her wife, constantly called me pet names like my love n stuff n flirted w me like i was hers. She referred to me saying "youre mine" n i told her i was all hers. It originally started as a joke we both agreed to, but i ended up genuinely believing it. I fell so hard in love with her very quickly. I knew she was aromantic, i knew she was religious, i thought it was js fun, i know how naive i am, so why did i let it happen? now i cant escape it. Her flirting kept on overwhelming n flustering n upsetting me cuz i knew it was such a blatant lie, A joke yeah, but still a lie. She never loved me. She never did like that. Im such a fool. This started in january of 2025, now its jan of 1026, whats happened between then you may ask,? i confessed my feelings to her twice, she only took me really seriously the second time, we have talked this out a lot, Shes said she wouldve loved to be a relationship w me if she was able to reciprocate. Shes imagined being in a relationship w me, to hold me n everything. She truly loves and cares about me, n is terriblly sorry this happened. But she knows that for all the love n affection id give her in a relationship wouldnt be able to be reciprocaed. All healthy happy communication in friendship that we needed , my best friend of two years, i love her to bits. I FINALLY set boundaries w her in Oct of 2025 , to stop flirting w me cuz it clearly ain't having a good affect on my pysche, often causes me extreme stress or crying or worse from every little interaction. Guess what? I'm still in love, desperately so but i dont show it. I'm fact I grew pissed with her from withdrawing all the lovey dovey affection from me cuz I requested her to do it . I didbt tell her that tho cuz its unreasonable. I get so jealous still seeing her flirt w others. It's weird cuz she isn't a flirty type of person, I mean that deadass, only between me n one of her other friends likely? Its not a hateful type of jealousy us, possessive slightly, I'm scared you're going to leave me n replace me. I want it back. I want the girl back that loved me like her life depended on it, even if it was a joke. My sweet girl, my best friend. Not some other bitches "precious gem", YES THATS SO FUCKING TARGETED BITCH. Sorry you're not a bitch I'm js pissed at myself said "bitch" is actually a cool friend to have n a very close friend to the subject of my misery. N she's super sweet n she deserves that sweet treatment , sigh. I still get flustered when talking to her even if its purely platonic, not even any allusions to romance anymore. Ive had a finishing conversation no nothing new has developed, only the facts that we been laid out for months. She told me to talk to someone more experienced at this since we're both bad at this romance thing. Only thing she could think of was distance. To distance myself from her. Ive tried taking weeks of breaks from her before. My feelings haven't changed. I told her distance sounded like torture no she agreed saying that she didn't wanna leave me either. She's my safespace,we've both been through our highs n lows n stayed n helped each other through it. I know her very well n I love her,,, my best friend n unfortunately my crush of almost a year,,,11 months atp. Other friends have said to cut off ties n block her, but I don't think they understand how I'm not gonna be able to do that without losing myself n my sanity, n hurting her . I can exist having a friendship w her. I managed to do so for a year before she started being randomly lovely dovey w me since valentine's of last year. then I've been the same girl, super overly sweet n loving n funny n affectionate I'm like her "sunshine" as she's called me before, I miss when she calls me her baby m how much she loves me. But I'm still quietly tweaking over smth she doesn't have a passing thought ab n I'm trying to keep my shit together. What do I do?,,sorry this is crap I'm so tired, n if you see this don't mention it girly you said talk to it others ab it sighh